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| Illustration by Nicki Licking |
I really do. And I love singing about how much I hate my sin. You should try it. But it's not just an end to itself. God knows all about my sin, and still loves me. There's something very worshipful about praising not a distant God who sees only the good in you, but one who knows you intimately and can see all the bad as well. It's like having someone who knows every secret you have, will not look down on you, and still wants to be your friend. And if you don't ask him, he won't tell anyone.
King David realized this at some point in his life and wrote Psalm 139. God knows every one of his thoughts before he even says them, but David still has the willingness to say "Search me, O God, and know my heart."
I feel lost amidst all the suffering
I get tense when facing my own pride
I'm confused when I turn away from You
I seek rest in objects made of sand
Reaching for your light but never take a step
I'm the emblem of unwilling sacrifice
O my Lord, You look upon Your creation
War and violence, greedy and diseased
And I'm tainted just like every other child
Afraid of letting go, walking into the unknown
Opting for the broken, earthen vessels shattered
Why am I afraid of potter's hands?
O our God, yes our God, He sees it all
O our God, o our God, He knows it all
Father knows exactly why He made me
It was not so I could live like this
This is not why He gave me His spirit
Why He's kept me alive and healthy all these years
Why did His treasure die for me?
Why put me in His family
Unless He thinks I can overcome and die to myself,
And make His glory dwell,
Show the world that Jesus is alive and well?
O our God...
All His daughters, all His sons
They will see His holy One
With His scepter and His sword
King of Kings and Lord of Lords
With our hearts we give Him praise
A fragrant offering we raise
Let us work for kingdom come
Victory that Christ has won
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